Rants: page 1 of [insert PI here]

Right. Instead of bugging my friend with it, I'll send this into the darkness of the internet netherworld, where it will be viewed .729 times or so.#1: [Beanmaster is very familiar with this one, as is BEIKON D:... gomen ne...] I can't draw. At all. I know I am better than a very large amount of people, but that will not get me a livable paycheck. So obviously, what I need to do is improve, ne? Except that every time I start, I realize it's hopeless and give up. Then I tell myself, 'Noes! you must keep on! It is teh dreeeeam!' And I spend three days on one picture that I am satisfied with for about two hours, and after it's been posted and I'm happy and I've shown it to my parents and been showered with praise, I fall back into my slump and said picture is torn up and burnt. Now that I've actually finished the rough draft for a manga I feel pretty good, and can only pray my mood lasts until I'm done with the final copy for my dear, deardeardear Daddy. [hugs sick father]#2: [Also very familiar] I've decided my sister hates me. She's tried to kill me twice, I kid you not, and has threatened it before, and bless my poor little mame-soul I decided that she was just being a kid and still love the dickens out of her. And not at all in a Setsuna-Sara way. More like Ed/Al without the Elricest. ::cough:: And yet, she hates me. Point: After not seeing me for five days while she was in that play [go drama kids go!], she comes home and doesn't say hello, is annoyed that Iw ant to talk to ehr, all but runs out of my room after I get all happy to tell ehr what she's been MISSING FOR FIVE DAYS and I'm left once again alone, feeling like a very angst-buckety Bean indeed, except not as angst-buckety as Cloud. ...maybe Kamui-level. .___.#3: Yes, I am a fangirl. I do not, however, consider myself a 'scary fangirl,' like my friend calls us all. [Herself included.] And I wuv Meoi, I really do, but... I am not that level anymore. .____. Arguing my points do not include "but he is WAAAY more bish because he's liek teh hott and has fangs!!1one". ...Just setting the record straight, mister red-tipped- Hot Topic-posterboy-wannabe. And I am not punk, mister, I am an art student. A-R-T. And the rips in my pants are naturally there because I'm too lazy to patch them up... but I digress.#4: My memory sucks. To the point where I can't remember what I'm talking about AS I SAY IT. [Beanmaster is also very, very, VERY familiar with this one...] So i come off as being a ditz or soemthing, I just know it, and I really just can't remember... .___./rantage for tonight so I can sleep.BEAN